Momma Bear's Addiction

I'm typically not much of a TV watcher. Back in the day when I didn't have these little life and money sucking leeches my little blessings from heaven, I used to watch my fair share of TV - and if I had to miss a specific night, I was known to fire up the VCR and tape those shows for viewing at a later date. I may or may not have even scheduled my post-secondary classes (my first time around - I've been to school numerous times) around specific shows, like Supermarket Sweep, Press your Luck, and Bumper Stumpers - and nothing, and I mean *NOTHING* would ever infringe on 90210 (the original) and Melrose Place night (those shows trumped EVERYTHING maybe even our future success.

When we first moved into our current house 17 years ago!! Shit, I'm old! a few short years ago, we did in fact have a TV, but we didn't have cable or satellite. That was ENTIRELY partially due to the fact that we were fricken fracken poor because we'd bought a house and could hardly afford to eat, let alone some frivolity like cable were saving money and were researching to make an informed decision. During those months, it was refreshing to not have that umbilical cord connected to the TV. Haha! Who am I kidding? Those were some of the hardest months of our lives - you know, kinda like TV rehab. For real. At first I literally had the sweats - although that arguably could have been contributed to the stifling and suffocating heat and humidity of that spring, summer and fall. Holy shit - it was hot - our house was like a sauna on crack. I'm certain that living in hell would have been like an afternoon in the Arctic comparatively. Incidentally, we decided that we didn't need to eat or heat the house for the next few years, and had air conditioning installed that fall. Did I mention that it was hot that year? Like really, really, REALLY hot?! Because it was). Anyway, I digress. Again.

Back to TV. It was like going cold turkey without TV. We weren't completely living "off the grid" - I mean, we did have technology. You know, a state-of-the-art RCA VCR. And a pile of videos. Children's videos. Like Barney. And Teletubbies. and Disney movies. Did I mention Barney? Because teen, who was just a little pipsqueak at the time tortured me to the point of needing a padded room watched that delightful, friendly, completely un-annoying purple dinosaur over and over and over - always begging me to watch with her because she was a chicken shit about being downstairs on her own because we liked to bond and discuss the life lessons we gleaned from whatever episode we saw (even though we saw the same damn episodes a bazillion times - and honestly, there wasn't any value in those shows - I mean come on, it's purple dinosaur with friends named BJ and Baby Bop. Seriously?! That's just one pimp short of a porn movie!!). Anyway, TV. After almost a year, pretty much when my other half and I were right on the edge of insanity; we relented and got satellite. BUT...I was over it. I realized quickly that I had better things to do with my time, and since I'd missed out on so much in "my programs", I was out of the loop. I basically gave up watching any of them, not to mention I had a kid and my other half who seemed to think the "power" (AKA the remote) belonged to them. SO...I didn't watch too much of anything. Don't get me wrong, I did have a few shows that I readily watched - you know, Survivor and the likes. BUT...then I got pregnant. Being hugely pregnant in the winter months didn't contribute to much activity beyond working my full-time job and crashing in front of the TV. Eventually I got sucked into TV again and added a lot a few more programs to my "must see's". Then suddenly I was sucked up into daytime television (that's a whole different bag) I mean, I had to do something while I spent hours upon hours sitting on the couch feeding my baby. And then I got knocked up again (obviously I pried myself away from the TV long enough for that to happen), and the pattern repeated itself Then, my babies started to grow up and they started to take control of the programming. Suddenly, I didn't really need satellite or cable at all - all I really needed was one single channel: Treehouse. At first I enjoyed watching these fun, mostly educational (and Barney free) TV shows, I mean come on - what's not to love about a kid named Dill Pickle or Bobby's world or watching the trials and tribulations of Peep and his buddies in the big wide world? After approx. 13 straight years of Treehouse (with surprisingly little variation - they showed the same damn shows, day after day, week after week, month after month, year after year), I gave up and mostly walked away from TV - unless it was later at night - well after the kids went to bed. Don't get me wrong - I still had my favourite must see programs (of which I mostly PVR so I can quickly get through them without watching commercials), but I certainly didn't spend all of my evenings or free time watching or listening to the TV.

Then my kids got older. They got more and more involved with activities, which meant that Momma Bear had to transport them around, and then Momma Bear went back to school and had homework, and then she got a job. And the kids and my other half totally took over the TV rights in our house. Which was A-Ok with me. I'd watch my PVR'd shows here and there (my other half and I do watch some of the same programs - so on Thursday nights, we usually sit and watch all the shows we've pvr'd from the previous week. It was a good set up - and I was happy with it. I mean, I'd prefer to not numb my brain with mindless TV (because Modern Family and these various crime shows are completely educational programs and such).

With having a teenager in the house, we of course are all up and jiggy with technology and such. Somehow we ended up with 3 TV's. After much badgering from teen, we finally gave in and subscribed to Netflix. For $8/month you can't go wrong - I mean come on - who doesn't want to have unlimited access to a bunch of old, washed up tv series and old movies? Needless to say, it wasn't something that I had ANY interest in. I spent more time trying to find a movie than actually watching anything. There are seemingly endless amounts of programs, series, and movies, yet I couldn't ever seem to find anything to watch. I spent more time trying to figure out what to watch than actually watching anything. In my opinion, it was just a waste of time and money. Teen, however, didn't have any issue - she would watch all sorts of programs - so much so, that within 3 days of our internet renewing for another month, I'd get the dreaded "you've reached 90% of your monthly usage limit" message. That meant that I had to change the password for the internet so no one would go on it for the rest of the month. After several months of that, Momma Bear had to negotiate a great deal with our cable provider which included unlimited internet. We were golden after that. Life went on merrily - I'd do my thing, the kids and my other half would watch their tv show - with me plopping down here and there to watch alongside them; and Teen would happily watch whatever it was she watched on Netflix. I was happy with my TV viewing habits. I really was.

Then...I got introduced to Netflix again (where have you been all my life? Why did I have so much trouble in the first place? And no...it's not because I'm old. I heard people talking about a bunch of different shows. I felt kinda dumb because I didn't even know what they were talking about. Hell, half the time, I hadn't even heard of the name of the show. SO...during the Christmas holidays, I decided to check one of them out. Enter Netflix here. Much to my surprise and happiness, it conveniently had all the seasons neatly lined up for my viewing pleasure - right at the touch of a button. Actually, it's A LOT of buttons to get to Netflix - it's a terribly complex event. I don't know how to work the TV\s and such, so I shamelessly admit that my children have to get the TV to the settings I need so I can turn on the Apple TV box so I can watch this series.

What series, you ask? Breaking Bad. This show is about drugs, and I'm telling you, I'm addicted to this freaking show like it's a drug itself. I can sit for hours and hours until the wee hours of the morning watching episode after episode (like right this second I'm watching it - as I type - because I can multi-task like a pro). Then I made the mistake of looking at other TV series, and I discovered some shows from my younger days - shows that I now need to watch. In my defense, how can you even consider passing up the chance at watching every single episode of Square Pegs?! Or WKRP in Cincinnati? Or 90210 (the original)? |Then I find shows that I want my kids to experience because they were awesome and my favourites when I was a kid (funny-they don't appreciate good, wholesome TV shows when they see them). Then, after I watch a program, Netflix conveniently makes suggestions for me about what I might like to watch. And it's usually right. So then I add them to my list and watch a few here and there (usually earlier in the evening when my kids might be around - I'm not ready to allow them to watch Breaking Bad - although I DID take them to the theatre to watch Dumb and Dumber 2 - which was HIGHLY inappropriate for them. Yeah, I think I won Mother of the Year award for that one).

Then I discovered a bunch of movies that I haven't seen, so I've added those to my list...

Yeah, so, DAMN YOU NETLIX!!! You've ruined my life. I feel as though I need an intervention...